my life story

when i was repairing the speakers of the computer today. i saw a tennis ball isolated at one corner. then i turned around, i saw 2 rackets of which i've worn out quite hardly on. so i decided to play a little on it. unknowingly, i'm sucked back into my painful memories of my tennis life.

i started playing tennis since primary two. i cannot remember was i recruited or i joined on my own will. nevertheless, i thoroughly enjoyed every part of it. that time, i was playing mini-tennis. its not much different from real tennis, just that the court is smaller and the ball is softer. i guess it was created to fit the primary school students.

you have no idea how much i poured out my life into tennis then. i started off with the guidance of two PE teachers who knew mini-tennis. its not until when i was primary 3 when the school hired a coach. that was when my tennis starts to peak.

coach philip, whom till now i could still vividly remember. he was right down strict. and i guess, i benefited the most out of his strictness. he would talk all the time about discipline and focus till i got them in my head. anytime the team made a mistake, he would make us run 2 rounds in the field. man, he was the best coach i've ever seen. he would make use of everything, even the stage beside the tennis courts. chairs was put up as nets when there is none, walls were used as additional arena. in that kind of atmosphere, i LOVE to be in. man, that was my passion. no fans, no windows open, it was pure tennis training in the stuffy hall. i remember, at one instance, i beat the coach a ball.

primary 4, i earned my place up into the school team. that time, i could remember was, the top 3 players would play singles for the tournament. whereas the rest of the 4 will play two pairs of doubles each. that is the team for the tournament. apparently, i was never played in the doubles. i was fighting to be the very best. haha. no matter how hard i tried, i was only second best then. the only consolation i could think of is, i'm playing among primary 5's abd 6's. as the competition came nearer, the team trained harder. i was in a total preparation to take on opponents.....i thought.

i was beaten flat in the tournament. except for the last game. well, i don't know how experienced the opponents were, it was my first time taking part. i knew i tried, i perspired, i gave my all though. i even played the best player in the zone and got thrashed. it was hard on me. haha. however, the coach assured me of a better player the year after. the promise never came true.

it was well into march of primary five. and no announcements had been made to call the tennis players to start training. my mum called the school. and found out something from the receptionist. the receptionist said,'' Is there any mini-tennis for boys? no, we have only mini-tennis for girls only.'' imagine how much that words broke through my 11 year old heart. my passion, my dream, my life went into smoke. zz.

i confirmed with mr khai that truly, the team was disbanded, due to fruitless result in the tournament the previous year. i was obviously, not satisfied with the answer, or rather the decision of the school. the team obviously had grown in maturity, some way or another. the team, obviously love the coach. the team, obviously put in hundreds of hours in training. perhaps for me, close to 500. the team, obviously tired its best in the tournament. and the school obviously made a mistake by disbanding it without any notice or talk. apparently, primary students were treated like kindergarten kids. someone thought we know nothing and perhaps will forget about the tennis crap. not for me.

so i was given a helper's task, to help out in the girls team. the school changed coach. and he was totally different towards us. i think he felt threatened, coz the 3 boys helpers were teaching the girls as well as he did. so he said nasty things, i quited. no point.

until now, this period still haunts my thoughts. i was still puzzled why the school treated us this way. i mean, disbanding the team without any notice and reason. and when i asked, it refused to answer. i now see what impact it has on me now.

i never felt passionate in any sports like tennis. certainly not basketball, even not soccer. i played tennis at the corridor just now, and despite the big constraint in size, nevertheless i enjoyed striking the ball onto the wall again and again. even though i lost 50% of what i used to play, i will give up my current cca to join tennis if given the opportunity. even if it means i would be secondary 4 by then. but apparently the tennis court now transformed into a netball court. i can only imagine now. what would it be like had i been given a chance to pursue tennis. if given a chance.