unknowingly its a already a week gone, which means a week nearer to that antagonising o's. didn't have a good week i would say. burdens, homework, distractions all quite piled up to dizzying heights. i really don't know how to propel myself towards a serious student. already i need to catch up on my sciences, yet i still occupy myself with unneccesary things(soccer, ambitious jogs on evenings, wasteful time wasting...). i'm glad i finally start get to understand what chemistry is all about thanks to the late night studies.

obviously this year us different from last year. already i'm quite feeling the heat of the need to study. need to cut down on time wasting efficiently and get down to business. i guess i realised its a thousands times easier to dream of o level than study for it. i remember this time last year i made several ambitious commitments. now i don't really know where are they, lost them thoroughly. just like what shakespeare suggest, men breaks more vows than women ever made.

during charisma lesson, was asked what do i see myself in the future. in fact that left me dumb. all i know is that i would be working at 24, married and father by 2630 and that's all. any further was all too vague to visualise, for me at least. all i know that its secured. sometimes i do wonder if there was any impact in these kind of lessons. all we get, in my opinion, was just a short term inspiration. it could possibly cause me to miss what is really the best for me. i'm a greedy person, i don't settle for short term inspiration.

all i see now is that a large chunk of notes infront of me, not literally of course. all i need is a good shot at it. Hg needs to be defragmented. no time for crushes, no time for games, no time for dreams, no time for outings, no time for idling, no time for distractions, no time for playing school, no time for rebellion. . time to get to work, hg. good that you thought it through. haven't i realised i made a large 360degree of thoughts last year only to find myself back at the same spot this year remaking commitments.